Finding Strength in Weakness

Lately God has been teaching me a pretty tough lesson. It's one that is definitely stretching and has also been really painful at times. It's been hard in application, but when it is applied is simply incredible. Even though it's difficult, I know this lesson is absolutely essential in my relationship with God and for being effective in ministry. What is it you ask? Simply put, it's that God works and is often glorified through our weaknesses.

What? Working in weakness? I know it sounds kind of counter intuitive. Weaknesses are looked upon as the plague in our society it seems. Let someone actually know that you fail or can't do something? Come on. Society says no way. So we try to protect our weaknesses from exposure and build up our lives masking our faults from others. We give up intimacy in our relationships because we don't want to seem weak. We certainly have to protect that fragile little ego of ours don't we?

Weakness is pitiful in society's eyes. It seems we idolize only those that show extreme strength. Those that pull themselves up by their bootstraps and rely on their own fortitude to overcome obstacles are the ones we call heroes. Look at our blockbuster movies...Braveheart, Gladiator, the Patriot...all movies that have strong heroes with huge fortitude and no weakness it seems. A weak hero? Come on. Put that mask back on before someone sees you and sees you may not be strong.

Where am I going with this? Here's the personal part. Here's where I bear open my heart. You see, my pride has often blinded me to the extent of my weaknesses. I've always been one to think I'm good enough, that I'm strong. I've always tended to gravitate toward those things that make me seem stronger in society's eyes, especially academic success. I've always thought that I have the fortitude to conquer anything on my own before me. If I just muster enough strength from deep within I could do anything right? That's what I thought. I mean it worked for Wallace, Maximus, and Benjamin Martin right? Yet even after repeated failures in my life in different situations, I still didn't get it. I just didn't want to own up to the fact that I have weaknesses...

These last few weeks, God has shown me repeatedly my weaknesses. He's taken away the pride for a moment and allowed me to see the extent and pervasiveness of them. I now realize how utterly weak and paralyzed I am with fear. I am desperately weak in self control. I am weak in action because I worry of others' opinion of me. I'm weak in love because I have a temper and complacency. It's been a week full of brokenness, as I ultimately realize that I just don't have enough fortitude within to muster to overcome these areas of my life.

So where does that leave me now? As I've turned to scripture, I now am truly starting to understand how God is glorified in our weakness. He is the only source powerful enough to give us the strength to overcome the weaknesses in our life. He wants all the credit in His workings. What better way for Him to get the credit then to work out of our completely weakened states? It's a testimony of His power. Without Him, we can do nothing.

It doesn't matter how weak you are, God's strength is sufficient. Look at Israel with a small weak army conquering huge armies or Paul who even though at times came trembling to people led many to Christ. God likes to show off in our weakness.

So now I've become more aware of the situations I face each day where my weaknesses are evident. Rather than ducking tail and running, I've began to just stop and start praying about it. I don't know how many times in the last few days I've prayed something along the lines of "Lord, I know I'm weak at this. I can't do it at all myself. You have the strength I need to get through this. Work in my weakness here..."

Sometimes there's victory. Sometimes even after I pray, I still duck away and hide to cover up my weakness once again. The times of victory have increased though and have been simply incredible. I really feel like God is using them to stretch and grow the faith muscle (as I like to call it) in me. It's brought new depth to my relationship with the Lord. That's for sure.

In our weakness, He is shown strong. Gosh, that has been such a huge revolutionary concept in my spiritual life right now. I pray the same for you. May He be glorified through your exposed weaknesses as well.